Briar Pt. 03

Apollo manages to push me through the hallway without anyone we know bumping into us, his jacket wrapped around me, my discarded clothes shoved haphazardly into my backpack. His coat is long enough to cover me down to my knees, but being exposed is the least of my concerns.

"Hang on, I'm going to call my dad," I say, pulling out my phone as we reach the steps of the computer science building. "I can't believe she's in the hospital again, that's like-"

"Oh shit, no, I just said that to get you out of there," Apollo says.

I stare at him for a second. Then it clicks and I let out the breath I've been holding, almost dropping my phone. "Oh my god Apollo you scared the shit out of me,"

"That scared the shit out of you? What about-" He stops talking when I me grab his shirt and pull him against me.

He's stiff at first, but then he hugs me, his arms melting me into his chest. I take a deep breath in through my nose and suddenly I'm focused on his scent,

When we break apart, the smell lingers, likely because I'm wearing his jacket. Like I'm his girlfriend.

"OK, what the fuck is going on?" Apollo asks once we're clear of the building, "Some guy told me you were jerking off in class and I find you with your tits out in your professor's office?"

"Oh god, was it that obvious?" I moan. "I..."

You what, Briar? Just fingering yourself because your best friend held your hand and that made you super horny? Your best friend whose jacket you're now wearing?

"I fucked up," I say, staring at my feet. "I... I wasn't jerking off but that's because... you know... it's not really-"

"Oh my god," Apollo says, pulling me away from the pair of guys who had stopped their conversation to focus on ours. "Is this a side effect of... you know?"

"I don't know."

"Why are you like this?" he asks, "Have you even thought about it?"

True be told, I really hadn't. Trying to pretend my body hadn't changed had taken precedence over trying to figure out why my body had suddenly changed. And truth be told, while I hadn't consciously thought about it, things felt... more right.

Well, some things.

"I... can you take me home?" I ask, my voice smaller than I intended.

- - -

Apollo and I sit on the floor of my apartment, since having chairs isn't really one of my strong suites, unlike making huge messes, ignoring my homework, and apparently, masturbating in class.

I'm wearing one of my big baggy t-shirts, and it's shocking how much better I feel without the binder on, crushing my breasts against me.

"OK, this is what I mean." Apollo says, pushing his laptop towards me. It's open to a tweet that says "some dude in my class was jerking off to the professor talking about C++ lol".

"Well that's not great, but that's not the worst thing-"

"-scroll down." he says.

I do so and see a picture of my hand in my pants. It doesn't show my face, at least.

"Oh. That's less good."

"So your professor saw that you were... doing this and demanded you strip for him?"

"He..." I debate on how much to tell him, "He kind of wanted to fuck me?"

"He what?!" Apollo shouts, then jumps to his feet and paces around the room, "Sorry, sorry, but like, that's really fucked up!"

That's true, but it also sort of stirred something in me. I can't tell Apollo that though.

"You saved me though, so it's all ok." I say, looking up at him. "Can we not talk about it?"

"What about next time?" he asks, "What about when I'm not there?"

"I... I guess I'll just fuck him?" I say.

Apollo pauses pacing and looks at me, worried. "Briar, what the fuck? How is that an option?"

I stand and shrug. "You know it's like..."

I don't want to finish my sentence.

We stand across from each other, neither of us really looking at the other. I turn and meet his eyes and the concern for me I see moves me. And maybe it's just a combination of the stuff I've dealt with over the past couple of days, I need to be closer to him.

So I take a step forward.

"What are you doing?" he asks softly, as I look up at him without tilting my head, something that girls I'd dated in the past had done to me when they wanted attention.

"Briar..."

"Apollo..." I say softly.

His face is definitely flushed. I keep darting my eyes between his and his mouth, being as unsubtle as possible without outright saying anything.

I want him so badly, it hurts. He watches as I bite my lower lip. I've been breathing heavily and he starts too, his breath hot on my cheeks.

"I want to give you a proper thank you," I say, moving my face towards his. Pause for a moment. His lips pressed against mine softly.

Then he slams me against the wall as he kisses me.

I moan as we connect and disconnect, our mouths and hips mirroring each other. I can feel his cock pressing against my pussy, and I press my hips against him to maximize our contact.

He holds my left wrist against the wall as his left hand gropes my breast, pulling and pinching my nipple, our lips barely separating for more than a second.

Then his mouth pulls away without warning, and I gasp for air.

He looks at me, his eyes wide. Then the rest of him pulls away.

"What the fuck did I just do?" he says, more to himself than me. Then his attention returns to me, "What the fuck! I have a fucking girlfriend!"

I pant, unable to think of a response.

"Jesus." Apollo grabs his stuff, "I can't be around you right now."

"Apollo, wait-" I say, as he starts shoving his feet into his shoes.

"-You're just..." he gestures at me, "You just accepted this change and you're like, super horny, and I-" he swallows, "- I need space from you."

He slams the door behind him.

I stare at the door as the echoes of his footsteps slowly get quieter. Then I flop down on my bed, sighing loudly. I am unbelievably horny.

I turn to the window and see that once again the blinds are open and the same old man is staring at me from the building across from me, his hand in his pants. He must have seen Apollo shoving me against the wall, us making out.

Without thinking, I pull off my t-shirt, and offer my tits to him. The pervert smiles at me, continuing to jerk himself off.

I start pulling my nipples with my left hand while my right reaches down into my underwear, fingering myself again for the second time today.

My nipples start to ache, then leak milk into my hand. The man notices, and the movements in his pants quickens.

I press my breasts against the window, so that he can see them more clearly as I continue to fuck myself.

I close my eyes and imagine Apollo didn't leave and is instead pounding me against the window while my neighbours watch. That everyone else takes pleasure in the way that my tits are pressed against the window, the way that my face looks as I'm getting fucked.

I open my eyes and the man's no longer hiding his cock in his pants, he's just openly jerking off to me. I feel dirty. And that's all that it takes to push me to climax, my legs shaking as I cum all over my hand, my breasts leaving streaks on the window as I pull them away.

The man waves his cumstained hand at me as I pull the blinds closed.

- - -

After my shower, I stand in front of the mirror, staring at myself.

Apollo is right. I haven't thought about why this is happened. I haven't thought about why this feels right to me. Despite the changes that I've experienced, nothing about my body feels like it's not mine. My fingers feel the way they used to, the scar that I got falling off of my bike when I was a kid is still there.

My recollection of the day that my body shifted were really hazy too. I remember feeling weird and going to the bathroom. But I don't really remember much about what had happened before. I was in class, I was at the back of the room, but I couldn't for the life of me remember which professor was teaching, nor what the class had been about.

The biggest thing I'd noticed was the heaviness on my chest. Nobody ever told me how omnipresent breasts are in your life.

I flop down onto my bed, and my brain reminds me of the dumb bullshit I just pulled with Apollo.

"Ughhhhh,"

I check my phone. No messages from Apollo, but I have a couple from Amy.

"Hey, so I was just wondering," the first message says, "Do you want to go by pronouns other than she/her? I kind of just assumed, which is pretty rude of me."

"Also do you want to hang out?" the next message asks, with a timestamp of ten minutes ago.

"Sure," I respond. "Let me get dressed,"

She responds with a heart emoji.

- - -

Amy meets me at a park not far from my place, near a bike path that leads into the forest. I shiver, regretting not wearing a coat over my hoodie.

Amy's look is immaculate, as if this is the only thing she's woken up for. Her eyeliner forms wings over her eyes and I suddenly deeply regret not learning how to do makeup. Or do I know how to do makeup? Memories surface of doing my own eyeliner in front of a mirror-

"Hey!" She says, interrupting my train of thought. "Taking a break from binding?"

I nod, immediately reminded of the chest pain I had been ignoring.

"God, it's so uncomfortable! Why do people do this?"

"Dysphoria!" she says. "You know, feeling like your body doesn't fit with what it should be?"

I nod, but I still feel like I'm behind.

The two of us start walking down the path, avoiding joggers and bikers who speed past us without warning.

"So, do you mind that I've been calling you a girl and 'she' and stuff?" Amy asks, looking sheepish. "I really should have checked in with you but you kind of appeared out of nowhere and... like I'm not trying to make excuses, I should do better."

"Oh... I guess that's ok if I'm not, you know, pretending to be a guy."

She nods, smiling slightly.

"So, you dated that nerd girl in the Dungeons and Dragons club, right? Are you sapphic?"

"Sapphic?"

"You know, into women."

"Oh, yeah... I guess I am if you're calling me 'girl' and stuff." I shrug. "I'm bi but you know, that's not something you really make public."

She nods. "Cause of the stigma?"

"Mostly because everyone reacts differently than you expect but never really positively? Usually it's either fetishistic, like 'oh, want to kiss a gay boy for me' or something. Or it's disgust, like misappropriated homophobia."

"You're talking about it from a man's perspective though," Amy says, "What about now that you're a girl? Or a woman I should say?"

That's a good point. I remember the girlfriends I'd had who were bisexual. And I remember all the jokes my friends had made about that meaning that threesomes were on the table.

And now I'm thinking about what an actual threesome would be like if I was in one the way I am now.

"Oh my god, what are you thinking about?" Amy asks, "You just turned bright red!"

"... threesomes."

"Oh, fair fair," Amy says, as if threesomes are something everyone has experience with. "So who's that dude you normally hang out with?"

I don't really want to talk about Apollo.

"Just a friend,"

"Oh, I thought he was your boyfriend!" she says, but I think my reaction makes it clear that she was wrong. "Sorry, I shouldn't have pried,"

We're both silent for a few minutes, before Amy pokes my arm.

"Hey, you're unusually quiet today," she says, "Are you ok?"

"I... just had a really shitty week," I say. "I got into a fight with... someone I care about and I don't know if they'll forgive me."

"Ah..." Amy stops walking, and holds her arms out. "Do you want a hug?"

I pause, then nod, and she wraps her arms around me. She's taller than me, so my head ends up resting against her breasts, but she doesn't react as that happens.

I keep expecting her to release me, but she doesn't. I pull back and she looks at me shyly.

Oh.

https://www.cancerandcareers.org/blog/tracey-sharing-the-news

https://plazapublica.cdmx.gob.mx/profiles/vucucofo/activity

https://www.charitychoice.co.uk/fundraiser/caroleerandolph

http://blogs.ccma.cat/abus.php?itemid=44849

https://cat-crm.force.com/catforums/s/question/0D51G00002vDhGJSA0/welcome

https://community.usa.canon.com/t5/user/viewprofilepage/user-id/131253

http://www.canalvisualbasic.net/foro/usuarios/dudufini/

http://talks.cam.ac.uk/show/index/112162

https://www.cestujlevne.com/cestovatele/47633

https://blog.castelli-cycling.com/2017/11/03/ryder-hesjedal-fall-riding-with-the-alpha-ros/

Комментарии

Популярные сообщения из этого блога

Growth and Lust Ch. 02 - Tied down

I'll Let You Watch

Home, Finally Home